Make a wish, but make it count: Charles Assisi, on chasing happiness

“What is essential is invisible to the eye,” Antoine de Saint-Exupery wrote, in his charming book, The Little Prince (1943). While it is intended for children, the truth is that this book — written a year before the French author, poet and military pilot died amid World War 2, aged 44 — contains a code for happiness.

Written in a time of great distress, the code applied then, just as it does now, in a time of ease and plenty for many of us, distress for many more, and somehow discontent and restlessness for all.
In our world, teeming with its lists of “must-haves”, it is easy to feel overwhelmed by the pursuit of happiness. But what if the key wasn’t adding more to our lives, but carefully choosing what joys to actually pursue?
Is it possible to step out of the pages of The Little Prince and talk of this in mathematical terms? Turns out, it is: Happiness = Number of desires fulfilled / Total number of desires, says my friend KL Mukesh, in response to my question.
What we fail to see is that working on the denominator (or reducing desires), is the most effective way to find lasting joy, he adds. This is the moral of The Little Prince as well.
How did Mukesh stumble upon the principle? He has lived all over the world, been an investor, built a reputation for turning companies around. But that was once upon a time. He now lives a quiet life of friends, family and volunteer work with NGOs close to his heart. There is a serene contentment about him that I have grown to admire.
As he explains his approach with gentle wisdom, I see that the equation he lives by isn’t just a mathematical abstraction; it is his core philosophy. Desires, he says, are like a river that is always flowing. It can sweep you away, and then you never then quite reach that elusive shore of contentment.
I can see his point. While there is joy in realising our dreams, the endless pursuit of new ones can lead to a kind of exhaustion. So, Mukesh focuses on reducing the number of goals. In a society such as ours, where one is constantly told to aspire for more, this might seem counterintuitive, but his life is living testament to the power of this approach.
Happiness isn’t about accumulating more; it’s about being content with what we have.
Since my conversation with Mukesh, I have realised that his wisdom already holds true in our lives. Upon observation, I have found that the moments when I feel most at peace aren’t necessarily when I achieve something, but rather when I am immersed in an experience that holds meaning for me: an evening spent with my wife and daughters; a good movie or book enjoyed at home; a simple, home-cooked meal after a long day’s work.
These are moments when the denominator is low, and, yes, the joy is abundant.
Mukesh’s advice on working on the denominator means stripping away the noise and being mindful of which goals are truly worth pursuing. It is a bit like making a New Year’s resolutions list, but instead of adding things, one is crossing things off.
There is something liberating, almost humorous, about realising that half the goals weren’t even ours to begin with.
Mukesh calls it “aspiring mindfully”. In our fast-paced lives, we often get drawn into races we didn’t sign up for: the next promotion, next tweet, next viral Reel or show. These races can be never-ending; it is all a kind of endless scroll, if you think about it.
He believes that if we pause and reflect, we can easily determine which of these desires are externally imposed. By letting go of those, we can find a deeper sense of fulfilment.
Mukesh’s life in Bengaluru is a reflection of this principle. He finds joy in helping NGOs connect with donors and volunteers, spending time with loved ones, enjoying hobbies he never had the time to pursue. In doing so, he has found a level of happiness, he says, that is both profound and sustainable.
We must add the necessary caveat here: this philosophy applies most easily to those who already have, rather than have-not. Perhaps it even starts there, in recognising how fortunate one is (and spending some of one’s time in meaningful contributions to the community.)
This realisation can help with stressors in our lives too. The next time one feels overwhelmed, one may draw on Mukesh’s gentle wisdom and consider working on the denominator. What is it you really need from the situation at hand? And what little treasures, hiding in plain sight, could you focus on instead?
(Charles Assisi is co-founder of Founding Fuel. He can be reached on [email protected])